The Cleverest Responses (57)

1. oh my god. i would like to … her

       +44
   ~peach
   12.10.07 at 11:26 am

2. look, I’m paid to watch you pee!?

       --7
   ~Steveo
   12.10.07 at 12:43 pm

3. oh my God, I locked myself in the cell again. It becomes funny.

       --7
   ~Roman
   12.10.07 at 1:01 pm

4. They stole everything but the kitchen zink!

       --12
   ~Jeff
   12.10.07 at 3:24 pm

5. What am I doing in a container?

       +19
   ~ILAFF
   12.10.07 at 5:40 pm

6. ¿Are you sure that I’m the Security Guard? ¿Do you smoke… like me?

       --13
   ~ficus
   12.10.07 at 6:14 pm

7. I love my grandma’s cookies.

       --14
   ~omg
   12.11.07 at 2:56 am

8. Oh no, The F.C. Valencia has lost again and the boss fired me!

       --15
   ~Boromir
   12.11.07 at 7:21 am

9. That guy farted in here and went away…

       --3
   ~Lionel
   12.11.07 at 7:45 am

10. yes I know I continue to smile to promote what a great job I do!
    make uuuuppp pleaaaaaase!!

        --11
    ~Dave
    12.11.07 at 9:27 am

11. Oh yes, it is peanut butter jelly time…

        +11
    ~jdizz
    12.11.07 at 11:37 am

12. And they said I would never make it Whitout high-school!

        +8
    ~Axel B. V.
    12.11.07 at 1:20 pm

13. 35,876…35,877…35,878…35,879….35,880…35,881…35,882…..35,8..8…3…1..8….SHIT!!!! i have to count all the stupid little lines again!!!!!!

        +26
    ~Erick Gibbs
    12.11.07 at 2:10 pm

14. well, sheila, this is my room. i know it’s our 1st date but…

        +31
    ~Anonymous
    12.11.07 at 2:33 pm

15. Good thing I lock the door to the armored car huh?

        --8
    ~Al Eien
    12.11.07 at 4:23 pm

16. pigs….are pink?

        --15
    ~evan
    12.11.07 at 7:11 pm

17. I like my ties red, like my pussy.

        --20
    ~Marc
    12.11.07 at 7:13 pm

18. Are you going to put that night stick where it belongs or what?

        +0
    ~Jim
    12.11.07 at 8:41 pm

19. Did he just lock the vault and walk away…? ha, joke is over

        +2
    ~Grady
    12.11.07 at 9:57 pm

20. In.

    My.

    Pants.

        --13
    ~dsheets
    12.11.07 at 10:42 pm

21. Oh my carrots are pretty dry.

        --14
    ~Anonymous
    12.11.07 at 10:52 pm

22. im gay, lol

        --11
    ~Brown Smith
    12.12.07 at 1:12 am

23. I’m sorry, but i will have to frisk your ass… ha ha

        --8
    ~nimbod
    12.12.07 at 11:22 am

24. Good morning mister Freeman !

        +7
    ~Hobjo
    12.12.07 at 5:44 pm

25. You know malm, sometimes i get lonley up here, o so lonley, and the thing in my pants is not a tazer

        --11
    ~Syrim
    12.12.07 at 6:42 pm

26. Does this suit make my head look small????

        --2
    ~scott D
    12.12.07 at 8:55 pm

27. Allright men, you’re trying to make me a joke. You said 14 and this one is cleraly 18 years old. I don’t want to fuck her!

        --6
    ~senfir
    12.12.07 at 10:04 pm

28. Uh… No. I’M the security…err.

        +3
    ~mj
    12.13.07 at 8:29 am

29. oh shit… poor people… (people entering after he farted)

        --8
    ~Oren
    12.13.07 at 1:53 pm

30. 3…4…5… cmon cmon…

    (he counts the floors as he wish to gets to 10 floor and pee)

        --11
    ~Oren
    12.13.07 at 1:54 pm

31. i like to scratch my butt at those nibbled steel walls.

        --4
    ~sebatan
    12.13.07 at 6:01 pm

32. no they aren’t out of focus, they’ve just been worn away…

        +1
    ~Mr Longden
    12.13.07 at 10:17 pm

33. Sometimes, when im really bored, i rub my thing on the steel,it feels better than you would think

        --6
    ~Syrim
    12.13.07 at 11:10 pm

34. welcome to my crib …

        +0
    ~mfg
    12.14.07 at 5:42 am

35. You know, being a security guard isn’t all glitz and glamour like you see in the movies. Like just the other day I slit a guy’s throat for making fun of my shoulder patch.

        +3
    ~John Cocktoasten
    12.15.07 at 1:43 am

36. can we play games?

        --4
    ~Anonymous
    12.15.07 at 10:41 am

37. Boy, wait ’till I tell my wife I got the Security Guard job. If any of those stock or bond certificates in the vault make a false move, BLAM! I’ll blow ‘em into confetti!

        +6
    ~Nihilistic Neil
    12.15.07 at 5:58 pm

38. I knew that ‘buns-of-steel’ cameraman was up to no good…

        --4
    ~Mike
    12.15.07 at 11:22 pm

39. Heeee…..
    I found Predator dear!!!

        --5
    ~Alexandr
    12.16.07 at 4:30 am

40. welcome to my elevator sir, and please note that werever u go, there u are!

        +0
    ~super agent 86
    12.17.07 at 12:58 pm

41. No, it’s a rental.

        +0
    ~Cochino Racing
    12.17.07 at 5:20 pm

42. Zee Fuhrer’s gonna rippe you a new vun!

        --2
    ~Zotdogg
    12.21.07 at 12:07 am

43. Well they did it in Ocean’s Twelve pretty easy.

        --1
    ~Rahl
    12.22.07 at 12:06 am

44. Do you like my new wallpaper?

        --1
    ~David
    12.22.07 at 9:10 pm

45. Why yes, I am happy to see you. No, it’s not a rabbit.

        --1
    ~dsheets
    12.25.07 at 2:00 am

46. Merhaba

        --2
    ~Yunus Emre TEMEL
    12.29.07 at 9:40 am

47. im thinking of a gay robot thats what the security guard is thinking of

        --2
    ~reSpawn
    12.29.07 at 1:42 pm

48. I’ll protect you from those walls!

        +0
    ~Anonymous
    01.01.08 at 7:39 pm

49. Oooh, trust me babe, you don’t want to know the things I would do to you.

        +0
    ~JD
    01.18.08 at 12:30 am

50. DAMNIT, NOT THE AUTHORITIES!!! Thats the last time I let Arnold ship the drugs.

        +0
    ~JD
    01.18.08 at 12:32 am

51. ” Time ? Mister Freeman ? “

        +0
    ~Mad sox
    01.31.08 at 3:07 pm

52. thats right i get payed to gurd a metal wall…

        +1
    ~littlejimmy
    02.07.08 at 4:55 pm

53. Never amount to anything they said, and now here I am in a solid gold vault…. sh*t how do i get out…

        +0
    ~Arctic Ranger
    02.11.08 at 1:51 am

54. So, Richie, you say you’re not gay either, do you ?

        +0
    ~damien
    05.01.08 at 3:03 am

55. Hey, it might be nothing special but it’s mine…

        +0
    ~NOX
    05.23.08 at 9:49 am

56. I wonder if anyone can smell it.

        +0
    ~pancho
    11.01.08 at 1:47 am

57. “I’m In A Box.. I’m in a box”

        +0
    ~MissM
    02.04.10 at 8:55 am

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